Lesbiatopia
1. You don?t
have to worry about gagging from a ?deep throat job?
2. You
never have to worry about finding the toilet seat up
3. You can
fix your own car and get your hair done within the same afternoon
4. Your
orgasms are real. Always. And so are hers.
5. You
never have to swallow.
6. You
never have to worry about facial hair touching you, anywhere.
7. No one
cares if you don?t wear a bra.
8. You can
wear a dick and use it better than most guys
9. Foreplay
is an art
10. You are
your own form of birth control
11. Women
smell amazing
12. You don?t
feel like a piece of meat, when she checks you out
13. You can
cuddle without feeling like you have to ?put out?
14. You
find a woman?s intellect to be sexy
15. You
watch straight porn for entertainment purposes
16. You
feel bad for strippers
17. Orgasms
are like Cornucopias ? they should be called the horn of plenty
18. You never have
to worry about breaking a nail, because you don?t have any
19. You can
pretty much have sex anywhere, at anytime, while flying completely under the
radar
20. Sex in
public bathrooms is so much easier
21. 69ing
is so much more fun (and a lot easier too) Hillbilly
22. I love
the smell of a woman
23. I get
to do the motor boat in my girlfriend?s fabulous tits every day!
24. I love
the emotional availability of a woman
25. I love
the nurturing care a woman offers
26. I love
watching my girlfriend get ready for a night on the town ? watching her get out
of the shower naked, put on her perfume, do her makeup
27. I like
the feel of a soft pussy over a hard, intrusive penis
28. I love
cuddling and feeling my girlfriend?s soft skin
29. I love
kissing a woman?s soft lips (yes, both of them ? cuz I know that?s what you?re
thinking!)
30. I get
to have a best friend and a partner all in one
31. I get
to wear her clothes and use her make-up!!! Dubbs
32. great
nicknames...like carpet muncher
33. sex on
a first date...without fear of pregnancy
34. "no
man's ever going to tell ME what to do!"
35. it's
like dating yourself 36. double the wardrobe, double the FUN!
37. WAY
less body hair
38. no
spooging in your face
39. women
taste better
40.
especially the vegan ones
41. one
word...BOOBIES!!!
42.
"we were just switching clothes, officer!"
43. No 2
clits are alike!
44. Women
make sexier bedroom noises
45.
Lingerie you can BOTH wear!
46. Double
headed dildos
47. The
ultimate in feminism
48. Chick
flicks are just movies in a lesbians house
49. better kisses
50. no
scratchy faces
51. you
LIKE when she grabs your ass
52. if it
really came down to it, you could totally find SOME dude who'd pay to watch you
go down on your girlfriend
53. women
don't pass out after orgasms
54. you can
do her front ways, back ways, and side ways cuz the wrist moves freer than the
hips
55. fingers
always fit
56. never
having to deal with "morning wood"
57. less
farting...which I don't actually know is true but women do not take pride in it
58. you
could call her your "roommate" and it's ok Paula the Surf Mom
59.
premature ejaculation? what IS that?
60. Eating
pussy is good for the complexion? it always makes mine pretty rosy any way.
61. The
trashman never sees used condoms in your trash when he hauls it away.
62. If you
work it right you and your partner never have to buy your own drinks when you
go out? all you have to do it make out? the guys in the bar will just keep em
coming just so you keep it going.
63.
Lesbians know that you can do more with your fingers then send text messages.
64.
Somebody will always has a tampon in an emergency
65. And
your partner won?t get all embarrassed if you send them to the store to get you
some.
66. You are
very popular? girls like lesbians, they all want to kiss us?.guys like
lesbians, they all want to watch movies about us? everybody likes lesbians.
67. Two
mommies in the house are always better then one daddy on the golf course
68. You are
sure somebody can cook
69. It good
to have a partner who has a sense of fashion
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 "69 REASONS WHY WE LOVE BEING A LESBIAN")